A Letter to My Teenage Son About Sex

Dear Son, I know it’s weird to hear about sex from your mom, but…we’ve gotta talk about it.

 

teen boy snow

Dear Son,

When you typed that slang term into the search bar, you had no idea the can of worms you were opening.

You had no idea the images and videos that would come up.

You had no clue about the searing that would happen in your mind.

You had no idea how slippery and deceptive that path is or how easily the devil can get a foothold.

And son, whether you live on a farm or the mission field or anywhere in between; whether you’re homeschooled, public schooled or international schooled, you are always going to battle this thing called the flesh.

The flesh is good at getting turned on to sin and eventually, you’re going to face full-on the monster you were introduced to last night: sexual lust.

Listen Son, what I have to tell you comes from a woman who faces sexual temptation. I’m not an out of touch adult who doesn’t understand what it’s like.

You’ll have to trust me when I say sexual sin will take you farther than you want to go, keep you longer than you want to stay, and cost you more than you want to pay.

This is true.

And I’m here to tell you…

…You need a weapon strong enough to demolish strongholds. You need a stick of dynamite powerful enough to obliterate addiction. You need a connection sweet and satisfying enough to command your loyalty.

And Son, there’s only one thing that can do that: the word of God and a living, vibrant relationship with it’s Author.

I want to equip you for this journey to manhood. I want to help lay a foundation in your heart and mind that you’ll be proud of one day… a foundation of no regrets. So here are 5 verses to help you as you face sexual lust and temptation. Memorize these, son. Meditate on them. Pray them back to the Lord. Commit your way to Him and He will direct your paths.

  1. “How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to your word.” Psalm 119:9

Son, the word of God is reliable. You can trust it to steer you right. The best way to keep yourself sexually pure is by committing your life to God and living a life of obedience to His word. If you are ever in doubt about whether something is right or wrong, find out what Scripture has to say about it… and then obey what you find. This will safeguard you from many dangers.

  1. “Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts. Instead, pursue righteous living, faithfulness, love, and peace. Enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts.” II Timothy 2:22

When it comes to the friends you make, the places you go, and how you spend your free time, choose wisely son. Regularly ask the Lord to send you godly friends who will encourage you to press in closer to Christ.

  1. “The mouth of the forbidden woman is a deep pit; a man cursed by the LORD will fall into it.” Proverbs 22:14

Beware of girls, even women, who stir up lust in your heart with the seductive words they speak. They are out there. These women are trouble and someone who is un-discerning will fall into their trap. Follow the example of Joseph and FLEE them!

  1. “You are tempted in the same way that everyone else is tempted. But God can be trusted not to let you be tempted too much, and he will show you how to escape from your temptation.” I Corinthians 10:13

God is faithful to always send a life raft on the raging sea of temptation.   He promises never to allow a temptation to cross your path without also giving a way to escape it. Look for it! If nothing else, focus your mind on the name of Jesus…the way of escape is right there!

  1. “My dear children, I am writing this to you so that you will not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate who pleads our case before the Father. He is Jesus Christ, the one who is truly righteous.He himself is the sacrifice that atones for our sins—and not only our sins but the sins of all the world.” I John 2:1-2

It is vital you know what to do with your sin… because there will be times you sin in some way. Heaping condemnation upon yourself does not atone for your wrong doing. ONLY the blood of Jesus can do that and the good news is that it already has! Sin will separate you from God; the blood of Jesus cleanses you and reconciles you to Him. Learn to accept this provision quickly, my son. This is the hope of the gospel!

I am proud of you and love the young man you are becoming. You are a precious boy and I’m praying for you!

Love,

Mama

5 MORE Reliable Verses When Facing Sexual Temptation

Some personal favorite verses for sexual temptation:

  1. God is the “Rewarder.” Sexual sin is not. (Hebrews 11:6)

While sexual sin offers pleasure and promises fleeting pleasure, the truth is only God is the real rewarder… and He does not withhold any good thing from those who seek Him. (Psalm 84:11 ) When sexual temptation suddenly strikes, I will call on God as Rewarder. I will take Him up on His promise to taste and see that He is good. I will say no to sin and place my trust in His ability and willingness to give me “much more” than sin can ever provide. (Luke 11:13)

  1. I am dead to sin and alive to God. (Romans 6:11)

This temptation to sin FEELS strong and it SEEMS more powerful than my will to choose Christ. But God’s word tells me something different. Feelings lie because Christ in me and me in Christ means I can choose to offer my body to God as an instrument of righteousness. I am not enslaved to act on these raging desires.

  1. God can deliver me from evil. (Matthew 6:13)

Jesus taught us to pray “Lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from evil.” I can run to Him whenever I’m tempted and He will deliver me.

  1. Choosing sin will only destroy me. (James 1:14-16 )

Although sin makes a good appeal, I know the truth: I will regret it later.  It may be painful to say “no” to sin in this moment, but choosing God’s way is what I really want.

  1. Jesus is my righteousness.

My righteousness has already been bought and paid for. I hold to no sense of my own godliness; rather I plead the blood of Christ and trust He has cleansed me from all unrighteousness.  I cling to the work Christ has done on my behalf.

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Arabah Joy
Arabah Joy is wife to Jackson, adoptive and biological mom to 4 little ones, and missionary to East Asia. Her adventures span far and wide, from eating pig snouts to giving birth in three different Asian countries. Mostly though, she is a broken woman redeemed by grace. She has written several books including the 40 day devotional, Trust Without Borders. You can find out more and connect with her at ArabahJoy.com.

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