How to Break Down the Pinterest-Painted Walls and Get Real With Your Mom Friends

Momversations at playdates often occur in short snippets while chasing kids – why not cut the small talk and make those moments count?

I’ve noticed a trend in my social life recently. Whenever I get together with another mama of little ones, I mostly talk about “surfacy things.” I will only share personal issues once I know a fellow mama has my Crayola marker streaked back.


(and this is painful to admit)

I do not know how my friend is doing spiritually while in the midst of the splash pad, playground, or germ infested booth at McDonalds. Is she struggling to trust God? Is she content with where God has her?

How is she doing really

I usually have no clue.

But I know all about her kids. And she will leave our time together fully aware of the:

  • amazing toddler craft ideas I discovered on Pinterest,
  • latest meltdown or achievement of my kiddos,
  • latest mommy debate on the blogosphere,
  • latest on my husband’s job or when the military might move us (HA!)
  • awesomeness of Downton Abbey.

Now hear me out. These topics are not bad (ESPECIALLY Downton Abbey). But enough of this for at least 5 minutes of the play date!

(Yes, I know most play date conversations last 5- 10 minutes 1-2 minutes before the next meltdown or sibling fight erupts. I am going to remain positive and leave “for at least 5 minutes” in the third sentence of the previous paragraph. A mom can always hope for 5 minutes…)

If I am totally honest, I am weary of always talking about my children and the military. Yes, I love our great country and am extremely proud of my husband’s service. I love my kids. I am proud of them. I delight in sharing about the hilarious things they do or say all over Facebook just like every other momma. In fact, I posted this picture and caption the other day:



Every once in a while my son just needs to stick his head into the mailbox for no apparent reason :) #musingsofaboymom



(and this is also painful to admit)

some days I struggle to remain hopeful in what God has promised. I grow weary of waiting for God to move. Sometimes I feel that God is not hearing my prayers. There are moments where the guilt over my impatience towards my children threatens to eat me alive- so I fail to see past my emotions.

I typically leave the playground keeping all of this inside my weary mama’s heart.

However, one particular play date with my neighbor erased my weariness. We allowed our conversation to venture into deeper matters…


image courtesy of "sixninepixels"/


My neighbor and I are mommas to five kids under the age of 8. Our play dates are crazy y’all. Yet, we managed to squeeze in a 5-10 minute 1-2 minute conversation about Jesus while our children attempted to play nicely together. After we had left, my neighbor sent me a text message expressing her thanks for our time together. She felt encouraged by our conversation. I knew what she meant because I felt the same way.

No, we did not complete a Bible study workbook or have burning candles around us as we uttered some long monastic type prayer. We simply focused on the grace and love of Jesus as we wiped noses and broke up wars over the one toy no one was playing with a couple minutes prior.

I left her house feeling refreshed, strengthened, and hopeful because we focused on the Source of our refreshment, strength, and hope~ Jesus.

It was a beautiful thing.


A gift.


image courtesy of tiverylucky/


So fellow mamas, do you have a “surfacy” habit? How often do you allow Jesus into your conversation?

Your answer matters greatly.

Refreshment and courage to do this mom thing again tomorrow will not come from sharing discipline techniques or healthy toddler snack choices. Contentment, wisdom, patience, and the strength to keep going stems from us knowing and calling on Jesus, together.




Would you join your used-to-be-manicured hand with mine and strive to be the mama that brings the focus back onto Jesus amidst the poopy diaper stench at the splash pad?

Invite Jesus into that germ infested booth. He will make the moments between spilt drinks, screams, and scraped knees tolerable and refreshing.

Precious 1-2 minute 5-10 minute intervals await.

Bring Jesus into them.

Tracy Steel
Tracy Steel is a slightly extroverted woman from the Midwest who loves people and the God who made them. Tracy is proudly married to Chad, a pilot in the United States Air Force.  Whenever they are not being relocated, she loves to drink green tea and watch Downton Abbey. She also enjoys chasing their two children, Jackson (6) and Katherine (4), throughout their Lego-infested home.  Tracy is the author Images of His Beauty, and a contributor for, and for the Whatever Girls, an online ministry for teen girls and their mothers. You can read more of her ramblings about life, faith, and motherhood over at