One of the many reasons people give for not getting involved in foster care is: “I’d get too attached. It would hurt too much to give them up.” Most foster parents who hear that reason would counter back: “You’re right. It DOES hurt too much. But they’re worth it.”
One foster mom, Amber Davis, shared the heartbreak that comes with the first time you have to let go of a child that you’ve loved like your own for months and months. Davis posted her story to the Love What Matters Facebook page, along with a heart-wrenching photo of her last embrace with her foster baby. She says:
Photo: Amber Davis/Love What Matters
“We lost the fight. And by “lost” I mean I didn’t get what I wanted. My white picket fence has a hole in it and she’s gone. I made sure she smelled of lavender before she left. Filled her favorite sippy cup with half water, half apple juice for the ride to her new home for a bit of comfort and distraction. Told her I loved her and purposely made her holler and squirm from being hugged too tight. She likes to give hugs, but hates being restrained in one. I wonder how long it’ll take her new family to figure that out.
I wonder if they’ll learn that she’s a bit reflective of the Princess and the Pea fairy tale in that she has to have a soft pillow to get comfortable and sleep well at night. Otherwise, she’ll grunt and continually wake up throughout the night trying to get comfortable.
I wonder if they’ll figure out she loves to fist bump and blow it up right before going to sleep. It makes her giggle.She does sign language now to help with communication. If they ask her, she’ll sign “please” for them and let them know when she’s all done eating. I hadn’t gotten around to teaching her “thank you” yet, but that was going to be next.
I know she’ll be thrilled if they don’t make her keep her headband on her head like I have the past 6 months. She hates them. I’d get the stink eye every time I told her to leave it alone. Sassypants.
