How to Be the Mom Your Children Need

child needs

About seven years ago, I was a mom of a 3-year-old, a 6-year-old, and one on the way. I was about seven months pregnant, actually, when my daughter Sophie’s preschool teacher expressed some concerns about what my child needs, to me. She was already in speech therapy, so I called up her therapist, who had just completed testing her, to get her opinion.

She gave me some news I was shocked to hear. “Your daughter’s delays are significant,” she said. “I think she will need therapy for about three to four years.”

Further evaluations would reveal that Sophie also would need significant occupational therapy as well.

And so began a long journey into “special” preschool, therapies, services, testing, doctor’s appointments, and working very hard at home.

Sophie on her first day of preschool, a few weeks before her “develpomentally delayed” diagnosis

Looking back now, it’s a happy story. Sophie is fantastic. She whipped through that 3-4 years of therapy in just 18 months. She excels in school and has been recognized for her academic achievements. But most importantly, she is a kind, loving, sweet girl who loves Jesus and truly loves others as she wants to be loved.

At the time, however, it was anything but happy. I stood in my living room, hand on my giant pregnant belly and WAILED. I mean, I lost. my. stuff. I knew NOTHING about any of this and all the stuff my child needs! How was I going to help my daughter? I cried for days, trying to hold it in when the kids were around. Surely Sophie needed a better mom, a less clueless mom, a mom who could help her surmount her delays. With a newborn on the way I felt like I had my hands MORE than full—and truth be told,  with all my child needs, I did.

Sophie with her certificate of graduation from speech therapy, shortly she turned 5

When I saw the video above by Kristina Kuzmic, it reminded me of those hard days, and I knew I had to share it with you. You see, the message she has for you is the same as mine, even though her situation as a single mom struggling to make ends meet was vastly different than mine as a married mom with a developmentally delayed child. That message is: YOU are the MOM YOUR KIDS NEED. They could never do any better. God made them for you and you for them. What your child needs, He will GIVE you, if you simply ask Him. If you put forth the effort, He will equip you to be who and what your child needs—no matter the situation.

I didn’t know the first thing about speech or occupational therapy, but I could learn. And so I did. And God equipped me to do so. He gave me the strength and stamina to work very hard with Sophie at home as well as shuttle her to preschool and multiple therapies even though I had a nursing baby and a first-grader to look after as well. He made the finances available for us to afford what she needed, even though it seemed impossible at the time. And he put the right people in our lives to help us along the way.

Most of all, He showed me that whatever Sophie needed, He’d give it to her—through me, through her teachers and therapists, through her own hard work. He made her and He was gonna take care of her. He gave me to her as her mom for a reason, and I wasn’t to doubt it, I was to embrace it.

Sophie and I this past Christmas after she was a narrator for her school Christmas program

Just to be sure I got the message, He made the baby in my belly at the time all this was going on need much of the same thing from me a couple of years later—and so I got to be Therapist Mom again, with much the same results. (Even though I was like, “AGAIN? REALLY?!?!) 🙂

It’s the same for you, mamas, no matter what your kids are going through or what your child needs. You’re it. YOU’RE the one. The mom they need, the only one who is perfectly made for them. So embrace it, my loves. Ask God to equip you to help your kids, and be prepared for Him to show up. After all, He not only made your kids—He made you, and he will take care of you both.

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Jenny Rapson
Jenny Rapson is a follower of Christ, a wife and mom of three from Ohio and a freelance writer and editor. You can find her at her blog, Mommin' It Up, or follow her on Twitter.