It’s Not Selfish To Need Some Child-free Time at Night — It’s Self-preservation

It’s not selfish to need some child-free time at night. It’s self-preservation.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Because it makes me feel like less of an a-hole for getting frustrated with my three kids, each of whom, from time to time, struggle with bedtime.

I’ve got…

One who fights falling asleep because it makes her tummy feel weird and like she wants to cry.

One who has trouble falling and staying asleep because her brain is consistently on overdrive and then she gets in her head about being in her head.

And one who, like clockwork, wakes up around 3 a.m. for anything from a bloody nose to a bad dream to just wanting Mommy to sleep with him.

So when it’s past 9:30 p.m. and not one of my children is asleep and I’m fully aware that I still have to help two more children get and stay down, which will likely involve 20-minute-interval interruptions of what I desire to be my Netflix binging time, I get witchy…with a capital B.

Tonight I’m doing better with it.

I’m more patient for whatever reason.

But I wasn’t last night.
I was straight-up grumpy.
And I’ve got no other point with this rant other than to let any momma or dad who is grumpy a-hole bedtime parent tonight, know that it’ll be OK.

You’re allowed to feel frustrated.

You’re allowed to feel overwhelmed.

And it doesn’t make you “the worst” if those emotions get the better of you sometimes.


Because 95% of the time your dear, sweet, energy-draining children get the real best of you, and that human is a rock and really selfless and amazing.

Photo courtesy of Nicole Merritt


This post originally appeared on Jthreenmee, published with permission. 

Nicole Merritt
Nicole Merritt is a mother of three, a freelance writer, co-host of I Am The Worst Parent Ever Podcast and the Owner and Founder of jthreeNMe; an imperfectly authentic peek at real-life marriage, parenting, and self-improvement. jthreeNMe is raw, honest, empowering, inspiring, and entertaining; it’s like chicken soup for those that are exhausted, over-stressed and under-inebriated, yet still utterly happy. Nicole's work has been featured by NBC's TODAY Show, Love What Matters, Scary Mommy, The Good Men Project, Elephant Journal, CafeMom, Popsugar, Motherly & many others. You can follow Nicole at and as @jthreeNMe on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram & Twitter!

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