I’m sitting in my bed right now next to my snoring son who is out cold…. mascara smeared from the mom ugly cry….and asking myself the very question all mothers ask at some point or another, “Am I a horrible, no good, very bad mom?” (Ugh yes I am having an Alexander moment here).
Let’s just start with a couple of flashbacks of yesterday:
– My son crying because he wanted me to hold him practically the whole time we were at the mall. Me: “Brooks stop whining… you need to be a big boy and walk.”
– Having the bright idea to have pizza and movie outside last night ….I had the projector set up with Paw Patrol rolling … pizza hot and ready to eat… and their favorite chairs all set up! Fist pumping the air for a mom win! Um no… what ended up happening was Brooks shoving his pizza screaming “NO!”, chairs were knocked over, kids screaming so loud im shocked the boys in blue didn’t pull up, and mama in the corner in the fetal position praying (little over exaggerated but you get it haha).
Flash forward to today:
I took my son to the pediatrician to find out he has a severe ear infection… as the doctor described as “even an adult with his ear would cry.” Quick tip for moms…. make sure you have a backup thermometer or that it is showing an accurate read.
So yea… I’m having a horrible, terrible, no good, very bad mom moment. Wanting to kick myself in my long back (apparently that’s what you have if your bottom is inexistent) for not picking up my baby at the mall or sympathizing with him when he cried because he didn’t want to eat. Guilt has set in… and set in hard. Crying the whole way home, apologizing to my little boy who may not understand a word I’m saying, and giving every car I pass a free ticket to the “crazy, emotional Mary show”. Until I realized… these moments have and will happen …. and there is no way to stop it. Either I forgive myself and learn from it… or I just throw my Eeyore costume on and play the part.
As mom’s we have to forgive ourselves and learn from our mistakes. If I dwell on all the mishaps.. I’ll miss all the heart touching moments. We have to just scribble our learning experiences into our handy-dandy mommy notebooks (that was for all you Blues Clues fans) and keep on trucking on to the next mom life lesson that will occur in half a second.
Some Horrible, No Good, Very Bad, Mom Moments I Hate to Admit:
– Letting my son stand up in the buggy… and him totally flipping out (check… no more standing)
– Allowing my daughter to take her babydoll outside as she plays in the dirt.. just to lead to a babydoll in the washing machine, and a baby crying for hours because she needs her favorite companion (check …no baby dolls allowed outside with dirt involved).
– Having snack too close to dinner… leading to not eating dinner and waking up with the shakes ….this one really gets to me (check…. afternoon snack will always be at least 3 hours before dinner).
– Coaching my son up the McDonald’s play area just to find him lost and hysterically crying because he cannot find his way out (check…. Make cheerio trail for kids in McDonald’s play area that leads to the slide…. hmmm never mind that may be a little unsanitary… have older kid climb the area with my child) .
– Coparenting when packing the baby bag for an outing … leading to no baby bottle because we both “assumed” the other one packed it… and now hearing the hysterical cries of a baby all the way home (check… one parent will pack the baby bag).
– Letting my daughter run free without a diaper when she’s had an upset tummy (trying to air out the diaper rash)… leading to diarrhea stains throughout our house (check.. Harper needs a diaper on at all times).
-Letting the kids play on the bridge at the park after it rained… leading to them slipping and landing right on their head (check…. bring towel to park after a rainy day)
-Taking off the nicest thing I own (my Micheal Kors watch that my husband gave to me before we got married….. and before he was broke) and handing it to my daughter at church…. leading to me not owning anything nice anymore because it is now nonexistent (check… hide expensive items).
– Bathing kids during their poop hours (which are pretty consistent: 9-12-4)leading to a caddyshack moment without the snickers bar (check… make sure the digestive tract is clear before bathing).
Proverbs 15: 31-31 – If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise. If you reject discipline, you only harm yourself; but if you listen to correction, you grow in understanding.
This article originally appeared here.