When Another Parent Made Me Cry at the Pool

My work is meaningful, and I could also do that job.

Parenthood is important, and so is foster care.

Ministry is fruitful here, and also over there.

Everyone poolside is calling out advice, warning, or impatience. Hurry up and do it already! You’ll do great. That will be hard. Are you crazy?

So I pray. Lord? Should I, or shouldn’t I?

And my loving Father answers, “You can, but you don’t have to. If you do, I will be with you. If you don’t, I still love you, and I will be with you always. Either way, My grace is sufficient for you.”

Sometimes I’ve climbed back down the ladder and wondered what could have been. What would that mission trip, that move, or that job have been like?

On rare occasions, I’ve jumped and freestyled my way to the other side of the pool.

But most times I’ve come up sputtering wondering what in the world the Lord was thinking by letting me jump.

Then I remember that poolside father. The one who reminded me of my Father God.

He’s helping His scared and gasping child out of the water.

Soggy and sobbing, I fall into his arms. It felt like failure. The move was rough. The job required more skill. Foster care was demanding.

But my tears tell me I did something hard. My water-slapped skin tells me I still have sensation. My draining sinuses tell me I was all the way in.

Whether my faith looks “remarkable” to others or not…

Whether my faith feels remarkable to me or not…

I drape my soggy self around Him, and I realize My Father loves me whether I jump or not.


This article originally appeared at ShaunaLetellier.com. Her first book Remarkable Faith: When Jesus Marveled at the Faith of Unremarkable People releases July 11.

Shauna Letellier
Shauna Letellier
Shauna Letellier is a self-proclaimed expert second-guesser but finds certainty in knowing Jesus Christ. She blogs about finding rest and relief in Him at www.shaunaletellier.com. Her first book, Remarkable Faith: When Jesus Marveled at the Faith of Unremarkable People, releases July 11. With her husband Kurt, she has the wild and hilarious privilege of raising their three boys along the banks of the Missouri River where they fish, swim, and rush off to ballgames.

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