Sister, God Didn’t Design Us to Keep Secrets

I need to be honest. I don’t like revealing my struggles.

There’s this thing called perfectionism that gets in the way. I’m not even honest with myself at times. If a problem starts to simmer in my life, I put a lid on the pot, walk away, and hope it doesn’t boil over.

But, inevitably, it does. And it’s never pretty.

Last year, I met a friend for coffee at our favorite cafe. I was looking forward to sipping my macchiato and enjoying our usual conversations about the beautiful things in life – how God was moving, new opportunities, and upcoming vacations.

It was going well until she asked me about a struggle. Not just any old struggle, but a sin pattern I’d been dealing with for at least half a decade.

My heart raced. My head spun with a flurry of ideas about how to avoid telling her the truth: I had wrestled with it that very morning.

I shifted in my stool and looked out the window. The moment felt like an eternity.

What would she think if I told her it was still a problem? I wanted to say I’d made progress – that I’d conquered it and moved on. After all, I already felt like a fraud for claiming to love God and have this in my life. I didn’t need someone else condemning me, too.

I was at a fork in the road. Would I sustain the secrecy with a half-truth or invite my friend into the raw essence of my hurting?

With a deep breath I filled my lungs with courage and let out the words.

Hard words. Real words. Honest words.

Natalie Yerger
Natalie Yerger
Natalie is a writer, encourager, and creative who helps women understand their worth. She's passionate about helping women see beauty and purpose in the everyday, which she writes about on her blog at Candles, west coast sunsets, and quiet mornings are a few of her favorite things.

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