Listen, I’m aware of the fact that I’m not known for my culinary skills. I’ll never make it onto MasterChef Canada or win a pie contest. Heck, most of the time I stare into the fridge and wonder what magic I’m going to use to make dinner. I’ve noticed that no one asks me for a favorite meal, and your sister has said I’m better at liquids.
But guess what?
I KNOW HOW TO BOIL WATER.
WATER IS A LIQUID.
“Dad’s Italian” is what you said, when I tearfully texted my feelings of betrayal. Yah. He’s Italian. I taught HIM how to boil water. I’m pretty sure he never saw the inside of the kitchen until we got married.
I don’t want to get into a big gender war or anything. I know men can cook, I’m glad you feel like you can call your Dad for anything. I’ll forgive him for being the favorite eventually.
But I carried you in my womb for 9 months. I gave birth to you, and you were a big baby. I’ve devoted my life to being the best mom that I could be. Just last week, you spilled an entire large-sized Tim Horton’s coffee behind the couch at the cottage and I kept my yelling at a reasonable decibel.
I’VE BEEN HERE FOR YOU.
So the next time you’re preparing a rather basic meal, feel free to give me a call. Dad’s going to live off the energy of this victory for a long time. Only contact him if your wifi goes down, you have to start a lawnmower, you require a money transfer or have no interest in receiving any Christmas gifts from me.
I can help you with sliceable cookies, salad in a bag, and I’m super good at coffee and peanut butter toast.
I’ve got your back.
I know how to boil water.
I’M GOOD AT LIQUIDS.
Love,
Mom
xo
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This article originally appeared at ShellyCalcagno.com.
