I’m Raising Them to Leave Me

But what about all the uncomfortable stuff for your kid?
What about having to redo an assignment?
What about having to miss a recess, sit in a time out?
What about when the teacher doesn’t have mercy on them for their late assignment and they get a zero?

What are we teaching our kids if we swoop in to save the day every time things don’t go their way?

I’ll tell you what you are teaching them…
You are teaching them they can’t do this thing called life on their own.
You are teaching them mom and dad have more power than all other authority figures.
You are teaching them if you whine a little you will get your way.

Those are all lies.

Being their heroic protector now is only putting a bandaid on the issue which will continue to fester and become a gaping wound in their adult life.

When our kids venture out into the big bad world…
we will not be able to email a college professor to “discuss” the latest issues,
we will not be able to storm a college campus to reprimand an unfair grade,
we will not be able to scorn their boss to help them get their way,
and let’s hope we don’t think we will be able to get all up in their marriage.

We have to teach our kids how to handle life.

We have to be raising our kids to let them fail and then teach them how to recover.

Sometimes this is hard to watch, painful even… but it is truly forming the character of that future adult.

I am raising our kids to be prepared to work hard and own up to their own mistakes.
I want them to be equipped to persevere the trials and tribulations that life will undoubtedly throw at them.

I truly believe it is better for them to progressively learn these lessons while they are under our roof.
Little people, little problems… bigger people, bigger problems.

It is our job to walk beside or behind them in these struggles.
It is not our job to go before them.

We have to raise them to NOT need us.
We have to raise them to leave us.
(it’s ok to cry now)

Spratt fmamily 2

Christen Spratt
Christen Spratt
Christen Spratt is a wife to one and a mother to four...(one from my teen pregnancy, one with epilepsy, one with SPED needs, and the fourth may or may not be related to the Hulk.)  She is a recovering “perfect wife/mom,” up to her eyeballs in all things motherhood. She doesn't have a Pinteresting life, cut sandwiches into dolphins, or have a perfect marriage and she regularly shares all this good/bad/ugly with my sweet readers at ChristenSpratt.com.    

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