Yesterday, I read an article by my blogging friend Brie Gowen. She actually contributes here at ForEveryMom fairly regularly and I adore her writing. And, this particular article was very, very good: short, sweet, and to the fantastic point. It is called
Go ahead and click over and read it, I’ll wait. She even includes a real life photo of what said house looked like before it became a spotless house:
Thank you, Brie, for keeping it real!
Ok, did you read her article yet? I hope you did. (But for the sake of making MY article make sense, I will quote her a bit.) Now, I should also tell you that Brie is a mom to three littles –THAT she HOMESCHOOLS– and she also runs a Rodan + Fields business and a blog AND she’s a nurse by trade, no longer full time but at least part-time/PRN. So she’s a LITTLE BUSY, yet she still makes time to rock a spotless house before her husband comes home from work. Why, you ask? I will let her tell you.
I didn’t keep things orderly because he worked out of the home more than me. We both knew that our collective days were long and hard. No, I did it just because it was something I could do. I couldn’t control how his day went away from home, but when he entered that door I could offer him love, peace, and happiness. Heck, even with a messy house (which did happen much of the time) I could offer him those things! But if there was something I could do to make his end of day a bit more enjoyable, I went for it. Not because he expected it or because I had to. It was simply a language of love.
Brie also mentions earlier in the article that when SHE was coming home from a long nursing shift, finding the house in order helped her be more relaxed and happy when she walked in. So, she strives to do the same for her husband. And I love that.
Obviously, there’s a “but” coming. Sooooo, this is the part where I admit here, that the title of Brie’s article made me cringe.
And that had nothing to do with Brie, and everything to do with me.
I have never been a good housekeeper. I have been more messy than neat my entire life! My husband is MUCH more neat and orderly than I am, but when it comes to the house, I have brought him down more than he has raised me up.
Oops. Because I am a woman, I feel totally guilty and shameful about my lack of housekeeping acumen (LOL, totally stereotyping here but I have found that most women I know feel guilty for ALL THE THINGS and most men feel guilty for VERY FEW OF THE THINGS). I have to constantly remind myself that I am doing my best in motherhood, marriage, work, and housekeeping and that I AM good at OTHER THINGS. Lots of other things! And yet, there have been seasons in our lives when I was able to keep the house looking pretty good. Sadly, NOW is not one of those seasons.
This is what my living room looks like now: