I could have taken the easy path and not adopted, but when I told Christ I was “all in” I meant every word. And adoption is something He called our family to. So when I share the hardness of adoption, I’m not looking for accolades for bringing a child of brokenness into our home; I’m reaching out for the same grace, mercy, understanding, prayers, and love that my son will also need in the days, weeks, and months ahead.
So please don’t tell my son how lucky he is or tell us how blessed he is to have us…because our “gain” stems from his loss. He has lost his biological parents, he has lost nearly 6 years of the everyday things we take for granted, such as clean water, his own clothes, multiple meals a day, hugs and kisses, a bed of his own…and so much more. Orphanages can only do so much.
And even when our son does come home, he will be dealing with the loss of the only “home” and family” he has ever known. These moments require grieving and grace. They require help and healing and yes, sometimes healing hurts.
The brokenness our family of seven will be dealing with won’t be easy, but I pray we don’t miss the collateral beauty. Because there is untold beauty in brokenness, treasure in pain and sorrow; we just have to have eyes to see it, to unearth what is hidden in the hard places and bring it into the light where it can shine like the stars, ever twinkling, ever lighting the way for others.
I am embracing this sacred pause between the waiting and the homecoming. Beauty and clarity unfolds as I take time to slow down and embrace the journey. My hungry heart is being awakened anew to the feast that is before me and I long to partake of every morsel, no matter how bitter at the time; because with Jesus, every bitter thing is sweet.
The nesting I’m experiencing isn’t all physical; my heart and mind are being prepared as well. And not long ago a mind-grenade went off: The adoption process isn’t the hardest part; it’s what comes after.
Increasingly I am recognizing the beauty in hard places. I’m slowing down more, embracing the journey. And it is here in the sacred pauses that I find beauty revealed. In the ebb and flow of our everyday existence lies beauty all around, of heaven revealed in the small yet extraordinary moments. Yes, my hungry heart has been awakened to the feast that is before me; life is beautiful…even in hard places.
