Are You a Foolish Woman or a Wise Woman?

Have you ever wondered why God did not say “a wise man builds his house”? After all, the husband is the head of the wife and the leader of the family. It would seem that the weight of building the home should be on him. But in His infinite wisdom, God puts the stability of the home on the wife.

We were formed in the image and likeness of God (Genesis 1:27). Most importantly, God made the woman to be a “helper” or great influence for her husband (Genesis 2:18). This influence was intended to be used to build and pattern a marriage after God’s desires for marriage and family.

Throughout the Bible, God shows us how He wants our marriages to be (Proverbs 18:22; 1 Cor. 11:9; Ephesians 5:22, 25). He wants us to build our marriages and homes in that God-like image. You and I, as wise women, are to use the godly influence we have to build our homes. Not to manipulate, but to build. Not to abuse, but to build. Not to tear down, but to build. I often tell women to stop crying over their marriages and use the influence God endowed them with and build their home. Dear wife, your influence is so strong that you have to be careful not to abuse it. Unfortunately, most of us never learn how to use that influence but instead cry foul every other day.

God did not say a wise man builds his house, but a wise woman does. She holds influence. I believe my husband is the architect and designer of our home, but as a woman, I must then take the blueprint and build my home. The power of a wise woman is unfathomable. Have you noticed how you, as the woman, can control the atmosphere in your home? In my own house, I have found that when I am frustrated and am on-blast with instructions to the children (and even my husband), the house is tense. I have also found that instead of the children obeying quickly, as I would expect when I’m bellowing instructions in a serious tone, they actually move more slowly and bicker among themselves. Everyone in the house becomes agitated because Mommy is agitated. As a mother and wife, I have the power to bring peace to my home or put stress on my family.

God expects me to build my house, and He has given me everything I need to build a solid, unshakable home.

If I am the one to build the house, I must come to terms with the fact that any existing problems in my home are not only my husband’s fault (ouch!). As women, it is easy for us to blame our husbands for anything that goes wrong in the home:

“He’s not taking leadership.”

“He’s lazy and shiftless.”

“He lacks initiative.”

“He’s bad with money.”

“He doesn’t take spiritual leadership in the home.”

“He doesn’t help me in the house.”

And the list goes on. All of these could be true, but I daresay your husband is not the sole cause of problems in the home. Many are caused by us women. Yes, I said it! We play a large role in the dysfunction in our home. It is with the foolish woman’s own hands that she tears down her house. She is responsible for her actions. She cannot blame her husband.

Staff Writer
Staff Writer
ForEveryMom staff contributed to this article.

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