These Parenting Quotes From Famous People Are Right on the Money. Hmm, Maybe Stars ARE Just Like Us.

parenting quotes

The other day I was pondering parent quotes and trying to remember a funny Erma Bombeck quote I’d once read. This pondering soon led me down the rabbit hole that is an Internet search for funny parenting quotes. Thankfully, it was a really funny rabbit hole that was good for my mom soul. Here are 8 of the funniest quotes I found—I WISH I could’ve said these better myself, but alas, these people are funnier than me. In some cases, I’ve added my own commentary in bold. Enjoy!

“When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.” —Erma Bombeck


“All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.” —Erma Bombeck 

“Insanity is hereditary. You can catch it from your kids.” —Erma Bombeck (I really wish I could high-five Erma for this one!)


“Having children is like living in a frat house—nobody sleeps, everything’s broken and there’s a lot of throwing up.” —Ray Romano  (Ermgersh. Just call my house Pi Sigma Crappa.)

“Becoming a mom to me means that you have accepted that for the next 16 years of your life, you will have a sticky purse.” —Nia Vardalos (That you will never, ever be able to find anything in.)

“Children aren’t happy without something to ignore, and that’s what parents were created for.” —Ogden Nash

“A 2-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.” —Jerry Seinfeld (Or an off button.)

and finally …

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare.” —Ed Asner (In that case, I really, really, need a bulletproof vest!)

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Jenny Rapson
Jenny Rapson is a follower of Christ, a wife and mom of three from Ohio and a freelance writer and editor. You can find her at her blog, Mommin' It Up, or follow her on Twitter.