3. Establish Sacred Times
This will likely look different for every couple, but something my husband and I do is turn off our cell phones AND stash them away in another room once dinner starts. They stay there until we set our alarms to wake up in the morning. We don’t typically use our computers or anything at night, so for us it’s only the cell phones, but this helps us to establish a connectedness to each other, and not unintentionally fall into the trap of scrolling or looking something up. We’ve even talked about getting a digital alarm clock so that our phones don’t have to be turned back on until the morning.
Another way we establish sacred times is by only bringing one phone with us when we go out to eat. I’m a chronic phubber, while my husband is only just a phubber, so we usually bring his phone in. But it stays in his pocket, and we only have it with us in case of an emergency.
4. Delete the Apps
You can have a Facebook and use it responsibly. One of the best ways we’ve been able to put an end to our phubbing is by deleting social media apps from our phones. We both still have a virtual presence, it can still be checked and used on a desktop or a different device, but we don’t have the simplicity of mindlessly opening an app like Facebook or Instagram.
5. Protect Your Bed
We already talked about how our cell phones are threatening our sex lives. Those suckers are getting in the way plenty outside of the bedroom, don’t give it the power to do so in the one sacred space reserved for intimacy.
For most of us, phubbing is a habit that happens by mistake. But for our own mental health, and the health of our relationships, it’s important that we’re mindful of it, and proactive in setting boundaries that protect our marriage and friendships.
