“Is this really my life?” the young bride said through tears. Theresa couldn’t believe she found herself “falling out of love” with the man she had vowed to love forever—only 18 months previous.
Theresa composed herself and told me the story of the whirlwind romance that led up to her marriage. As she shared with me how she and her husband met, I saw a sparkle in her eye and a gentle smile across her lips. When she talked about the long walks she and her fiancé would take on the beach, holding hands and dreaming about how happy they would be as husband and wife, another tear trickled down her cheek.
How did she fall out of love?
What had happened? Theresa couldn’t point to any particular event that had caused her feelings for her husband to change. It had all happened gradually. “Life just got in the way,” was how she put it.
What’s the Key to Staying in Love?
Theresa’s story is not uncommon. Many couples find themselves in trouble when they wrongly make the tasks of everyday living their priority—rather than nurturing their love for one another. So how can you cultivate a loving relationship with your husband that will stand the test of time?
How to Not Fall Out of Love and Build A Love That Lasts
- The first insight into building a love that lasts is to take your focus off of how much you want to be loved by your husband. If you become obsessed with your longing to feel loved, you will become more preoccupied with self-satisfaction than with building a happy relationship. And this, in turn, will undermine the health of your marriage.
- You may be surprised to learn the secret to loving your husband well lies in learning to love God deeply. Because when your love for the Lord is genuine, He gives you His supernatural ability to love others selflessly—including your husband.The marriages I most want to emulate are those of husbands and wives who have learned to love God so much that their passion for one another is almost supernatural.Don’t you want a marriage like that?
So how can you learn to love God so deeply that it spills over into your marriage?
Jesus said the greatest priority of life is to “love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength” (Mark 12:30).
