The One Thing Your Angry Child May Need From You

Twice in the last couple of days I had two boys speak to me in gruff sassy tones that made me raise my eyebrows a bit. They had both been storming about and generally putting off a negative vibe and adversarial spirit.

In days gone by, I might have gotten angry and told them to shape up. I might have even launched into a lecture about respect. Neither reaction would have done anybody any good. In my journey away from angry reactions toward gentle biblical responses to my kids’ behavior, I have learned to have much more empathy for my boys. My desire is to come alongside them and help them problem solve instead of punish at the drop of a dime. So when my boys own angry attitudes and inappropriate words became a pattern recently, the Holy Spirit checked me and prompted me to ask this important question:

“Son, you are really upset and this isn’t like you. What’s REALLY going on? What is the reason you are REALLY feeling so angry?”

Each time, they immediately spilled their guts in a flood of tears and relief.


Amber Lia
Amber Liahttp://www.motherofknights.com
A former high school English teacher, Amber is a work-at-home mom of 4 little boys under the age of 9. She is the co-author of Amazon #1 Best Seller, Triggers: Exchanging Parents’ Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses and the Triggers Study Guide. She and her husband Guy own Storehouse Media Group, a faith-friendly and family-friendly TV and Film production company in Los Angeles, CA. When she’s not building sand castles with her boys on the beach, or searching for Nerf darts all over her house, you can find Amber writing to encourage families on her blog at Mother of Knights (www.motherofknights.com).

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