Dad’s Texts to Mom After Toddler Pukes In Car Will Make Your ENTIRE Day

Every mom has been in the place where they are desperate for a mom’s night out, right? I’ve gleefully met my husband at his work and handed the kids off to him just so I could get the heck out of dodge for a night out with some girlfriends many times—but not as many as I’d like! Such was the case last week for Stephanie Patterson, who handed her kids off to her husband Ben and drove off to meet some girlfriends…putting her phone on silent.

Ben was totally ready for daddy duty…but unfortunately he didn’t get too far down the road before his own personal Kryptonite struck. His toddler vomited in the car and what happened next will go down in the annals of hilarious parenting history! Ben, a self-described “sympathetic vomiter” could NOT clean his kiddo up without puking everywhere himself. Check out his hilarious Facebook post and the even MORE hilarious pleadings text messages to Stephanie, who of COURSE, wasn’t answering her phone!

Ben says:

“Last night I was supposed to watch the kids, so my wife and I swapped cars after work so she could head out with some friends. On the way home, projectile vomit occurred, and then the police got involved. And the whole time my wife wasn’t answering her phone…. See the ensuing text message thread for the full story and unfortunate hilarity.”

After trying to call his wife, Ben decides to keep her apprised of the situation via text. And sadly for this dad, his situation soon goes from BAD to WORSE!


Apparently random ladies don’t like strange men puking on their lawns when they’re trying to clean up their kiddos, so they CALL THE COPS! Oh my word!


This poor dad had to take a BREATHALYZER TEST to prove to the cops that he wasn’t driving his kids around drunk, but was, in fact, just a bonafide sympathetic puker. WHY the puke-covered kid in the back seat of the car who “continues to barf” wasn’t enough evidence for them, I don’t know!

In the comments of his Facebook post, Ben said that when he finally DID get a hold of his wife, “She had a good laugh about it, and then dealt with the swamped car seat and barfed clothes that I left for her because I couldn’t handle it. She’s amazing.”

Well Stephanie, I am SO GLAD you got your mom’s night out! And Ben? Way to take one…or TEN…for the team! This one has got to go down in parenting history!

You can see Ben’s full Facebook post here. It’s gotten over 160,000 shares from sympathetic and amused parents! 🙂

Hope little Declan is MUCH better and you’ve all recovered, Patterson family!

Jenny Rapson
Jenny Rapson is a follower of Christ, a wife and mom of three from Ohio and a freelance writer and editor. You can find her at her blog, Mommin' It Up, or follow her on Twitter.

Related Posts


Recent Stories