At What Age Should I Let My Daughter Date?

How to raise a daughter who doesn’t need to date

1. Encourage her growth in Christ.

Help your daughter understand the value of the church body and encourage her to be involved in it. Help her become disciplined in Bible reading. And pray, not that your daughter would date, but that she would grow in the knowledge and love of her Savior.

2. De-emphasize the dating scene.

As your daughter grows up, talk about dating will be a huge conversation. Girls talk about it at school and with their friends all. the. time. and the pressure to date is immense. It’s our job as parents, I believe, to make them feel safe within the boundaries of our home. Love and acceptance is the key, whether or not she dates.

3. Emphasize her gifts and callings.

Your daughter is so much more than a person who dates or doesn’t date, so help her put her energy into other things. School, for instance. Being a good friend. Serving others. Your daughter has so much to offer others. She doesn’t need to date to do these things.

4. Finally, build her up in the Lord.

Each of our daughters is fearfully and wonderfully made. She is deeply loved and accepted by a holy, creative, and loving God—Scripture is full of truths like these! The best news is that God’s love for her is never conditional. Help your daughter see that she is worthy of love and acceptance just the way she is and that God, who was willing to send His son to die for her, is truly at work in her life right now. She doesn’t need a boyfriend to make her what she already is—a beloved child of God.

I love these verses from Romans 8:

“And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love.” (Romans 8:38 NLT)

“Since he did not spare even his own Son, but gave him up for us all, won’t he also give us everything else?” (Romans 8:32 NLT)

God, who loves us so much, can be trusted to fill in the lonely gaps. He knows what our daughters need—it’s not popularity or affirmation or even a boyfriend. What our daughters need is more of Him.

For more on dating and raising daughters check out Mothers of Daughters Discuss Dating.


This article originally appeared, published with permission.

Shelly Wildman
Shelly Wildman
Shelly Wildman is a Jesus-loving wife, speaker, and mom of three grown daughters. She's passionate about intentional parenting and loves speaking to women about it. You can find Shelly writing on her blog, Life on the Wild Side, and you can also connect with her on Facebook and Twitter.

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