What Teenage Girls Wish Their Mothers Knew

I have a friend who studied bridges and their purpose in city planning.

She explained how bridges are needed as a city grows and expands. They connect one part of a community to another and offer a safe passage.

We related this concept to raising teens – and why bridges matter in the parent-teen relationship. As a child grows up, their world expands and separates them from their family and familiar territory. They need bridges that take them home and safely back to the people who remind them of who they are.

As a writer for teen girls and a mom of three teen daughters, I’m always looking for ways to build bridges between their hearts and mine. I’ve seen how disconnect often begins when we try to give guidance without awareness of their thoughts, desires, and feelings.

Teenagers don’t care what we know until they know that we care, and one way we earn a voice in their lives (and build bridges that last) is by listening, empathizing, and putting ourselves in their shoes to understand what it’s like to be them.

So how do we tap into a girl’s inner world? How do we unlock the mystery of a teenage daughter? Clearly, every girl is unique, but as I surveyed girls on what they’re thinking below the surface, they agreed on some common things they wish their mothers knew.


Kari Kampakis
Kari Kubiszyn Kampakis is a mom of four girls, as well as an author, speaker, and blogger from Birmingham, Alabama. Her new book for moms, LOVE HER WELL: 10 WAYS TO FIND JOY AND CONNECTION WITH YOUR TEENAGE DAUGHTER, launches August 18 and can be pre-ordered through online retailers. Her two books for teen and tween girls, Liked: Whose Approval Are You Living For? and 10 Ultimate Truths Girls Should Know, have used widely across the country for youth group studies. Join Kari on FacebookTwitter, and The Girl Mom Podcast, or by visiting www.karikampakis.com.

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