How to Navigate the Challenging Space of Being a Momma of Young Adult Children

Mommas of young and adult children,

Can I share a truth right now? Thank you for saying yes.

So here’s the thing. I’m a mom of three kids in their 20s. If you have young kids, you may think to yourself, “wow, how nice to be done with mothering and to have all that extra freedom and emotional space in your life.”

And I’d nod my head in agreement ever so slightly. But then I’d open my mouth like I am now and say, “Actually, this season of mothering is also HARD. Like real hard. As in, I’m drowning over here h.a.r.d.”

Then I’d walk away leaving you feeling confused and hopeless.

Not really.

Because talking about this ‘being a parent of bigs’  or adult children space is important. I dare to be vulnerable mostly because I want to put up the caution sign for those of you not here yet. Apparently I missed the memo about yellow lights flashing into an empty nest.

I also share because I need an outlet and I could use a warm cyber hug. Sigh.

This space where my used to be little ones are now my adult children is hard because:

You have to watch your kids fail and make poor choices

You have to see them suffer and learn from their mistakes that gosh darned, if they’d only done things differently, then…

You are often caught off guard by a left hook or a punch to the gut when they bring up all your parenting mistakes from the past as ammunition for their own mishaps.

Shelby Spear
Shelby Spear
Shelby is a sappy soul whisperer, sarcasm aficionado, and pro-LOVE, Jesus adoring mom of 3 Millennials writing stuff & doing life with her hubby of 25 years. You can read her stories on her blog at, around the web, and in print at Guideposts. Shelby's new book, co-authored with Lisa Leshaw, is now available: How Are You Feeling, Momma? (You don't need to say, "I'm fine.")

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