Being a new mother in the 21st century can be emotionally draining. Especially when it seems like everyone has an opinion on how you should be a mom and parent your children. The free will of being a parent is limited in today’s society. One wrong move and you are being stoned by the peanut gallery. But what about the enjoyment of being a mother?
Being a mother in the 21st century is still worthwhile! Don’t get that screwed up!
Being a new mother myself, I try to remind myself every day that I’m not perfect but I am trying my best for my daughter. I had to condition myself not to care too much about others’ opinions and YES even family member’s opinions. They are only distractions and at times roadblock into your growth as a mother.
Mom Shaming is when someone tries to belittle or make a mother feel like they are wrong and incompetent of being a good mother.
Sounds terrible, right? Welp, there jerks out there who are mom shaming like it’s their day job. But, mommies, we’ve got to be honest with ourselves. We have fallen into times when we are mom shaming ourselves. We say things like, “Ugh I’m not a good mother,” in the moment of a mistake.
And that’s not healthy!
I have fallen short myself, mommies. I suffer from severe depression, anxiety, and PTSD, and I’ve told myself that I’m not good enough to be a mother because I fail at being a mentally healthy person. But, I learned that I can’t do that to myself and it’s not fair towards my daughter to just shame myself and cause me to shut down as a mother.
So you might be wondering, how do we stop mom shaming ourselves? It’s not like we can be perfect!
Welp, baby steps!
Here are some ways to prevent mom shaming yourself:
Know That Nobody Is Perfect.
No Matter how much people may think that their stuff may smell like roses and daisies, it doesn’t. It smells more like the garbage truck didn’t make their trash run for a week. Yeah. That’s not a pleasant smell. So, no matter how much someone may come to you and try to hide their smell with perfume, just remember NO ONE IS PERFECT.
You are trying the best you can and that’s what matters the most.
If you weren’t giving this mommy life at least 60%, okay, I can see why you would be mom shaming yourself a little bit. But, if you are going through high fires and hell water just to make sure your child is fine, mommy you are doing a great job!