7 Marriage Lessons: ‘I Didn’t Marry My Best Friend’

5. Marriage takes hard work.

It’s not fun to wash someone else’s dirty underwear, no matter how much you love them. It’s not fun to stay awake while the beast next to you blows down a forest with his growls, or snores, or whatever you want to call them. It’s not fun to have to be the light when someone else is in a dark place. It takes work—hard work. It takes far more work than it did to plan that fancy wedding or fit into that perfect dress. It takes serious, selfless devotion and commitment.

6. It’s a ton of fun.

There’s nothing like belly laughs with your spouse, the kind of laughs that remind you why you are together in the first place. There’s nothing sweeter than having your husband open your car door as if it were your first date. There’s nothing better than bragging on your kids to the one who totally gets how perfect they are. My husband likes to watch me ride my bike around the cul-de-sac, and I like to watch him dance with the kids. We like to tease each other and sneak in butt grabs when the kids aren’t looking. Marriage can be a ton of fun. You know what else is a ton of fun? Calling your best friend and giggling about how silly and awesome your husband is.

7. Sometimes the beauty comes after the storm.

A storm will hit your marriage sooner or later. Some marriages’ storms are worse than others. Some face hurricanes while others face drizzle. Marriages face death of loved ones, infidelity, broken trust, rebellious kids, financial ruin, or complete loss. Some face all of the above. I know for a fact that staying and fixing what broke will make you stronger. We’ve become such an instant gratification society that our quick fix is to walk away, but if you weather the storm, shelter each other from the debris, and pick up the pieces together you will discover that sometimes the beauty comes after the storm. When I repeated my vows to my husband and said, “for better or worse,” I meant it. I did not say, “for better or I’m bailing if things get hard.” Be brave in the storm.

I’m not an expert on marriage, and I probably have no business giving advice, but I do know that marriage can be messy and hard. I know that it can be beautiful and fulfilling. I know for sure that it can be bent and shaken, but it’s a lifelong journey. Appreciate and learn from the broken moments. Celebrate and dance in the good moments. It’s all worth it.

This post originally appeared at the Alamo City Moms Blog.

Candice Curry
Candice Curry
Candice Curry is a wife and mom of six precious children. She writes about her loving God, forgiveness, suicide, and autism at her blog CandiceCurry.com, and has been featured on the Today Show, Huffington Post, Yahoo, and the New York Daily News among other publications.

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