Quit Telling My Kids They’re “Going to Do It Anyway”

“They’re going to do it anyway.”

I don’t know about you, but I am BEYOND tired of hearing these words about our kids. MY kids, your kids, everybody’s kids.

“They’re going to do it anyway, so I’ll just let them drink at home where it’s safe. That way I know they’re not out driving drunk.”

“They’re going to do it anyway, so I’m going to make sure they have condoms or are on the pill.”

“They’re going to do it anyway, so I’ll give them access to the porn sites I know aren’t too hardcore.”

I heard this argument over and over when I wrote about Teen Vogue’s anal sex guide a few weeks ago. “They’re going to do it anyway so they need to know how to do it safely.”

Parents: I’m not buying it, and neither should you.

I am now 39 years old, but I remember being a teenager. And you know what? I didn’t “do it anyway.” My parents set a standard for me, in a loving and reasonable way. I was educated about why it would be best not to do these things. They communicated to me that they weren’t trying to keep me from living or having fun, but that they wanted me to be safe and if and when I did these things, at least be an adult who had some level of maturity to help me out with the consequences. And of course, they used our faith and what God says in the Bible about what we do with our bodies to help me understand why not drinking, doing drugs, or having sex as a teen was the best choice.

They set a standard for me. They weren’t afraid to set high expectations.

And they weren’t afraid to expect me to MEET them.

Jenny Rapson
Jenny Rapson
Jenny is a follower of Christ, a wife and mom of three from Ohio and a freelance writer and editor.

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