I like to think that I am a good role model for my children, but the reality is that I mess up a lot. This is something I am very open and honest about. While I do know and understand that I am getting motherhood pretty darn right in a lot of ways, there are definitely areas where I can, and absolutely should improve.
Some would say that unhealthy habits are a part of everyday life for people, and I totally get where that idea is coming from. Yet at the same time, these unhealthy habits don’t need to be a regular part of our day.
Healthy is not just about your physical well-being. Being of healthy mind is equally, if not more important. In addition, just being “healthy,” both physically and mentally, isn’t enough.
Our children are looking to us to be their constant example, and I will tell you that I am not all too happy with the example I have been setting as of late.
Here are 10 unhealthy habits that moms must stop now:
1. Negative Self-Talk
I am ashamed of myself when I think about how many times I have said in front of my children “Mommy doesn’t feel pretty” and “Mommy is not too bright.” It is so important to me that my children are comfortable and confident with who they are, but if they are constantly seeing and hearing mommy speak poorly about herself, what does that teach them? If I am ever going to stand in front of a mirror in front of my children again, I sure as heck better be speaking positive affirmations to myself instead of constant critiques.
2. Giving Into Anxiety and Worry
Not all moms are as anxiety-ridden and worrisome as I am, but some are right there next to me. For those of us who do get anxious, it is typically a completely involuntary response to our stressors and can often be very debilitating. The problem with us openly feeling our anxiety and stress in front of our children and around our spouse is that our negative and fearful attitude can rub off on them. In You Are Not Your Brain: The 4-Step Solution for Changing Bad Habits, Ending Unhealthy Thinking and Taking Control of Your Life, neuroplasticity researcher Jeffrey M. Schwartz, MD, and psychiatrist Rebecca Gladding, MD, teach us that the best way to rid ourselves of anxiety, worry, and other unhealthy habits is to “make your brain work for you” and “to starve” your anxieties, ultimately decreasing the influence and strength they have over you.
3. Rushing Around
As mothers, we tend to move through life and our day at an accelerated pace because there is always just so much on our plates to get done. But when I am rushing, do you know who suffers? I do, and my children and my spouse. My whole reason for being so fast-paced is to keep our little family “machine” running, but when I speak and act like a rushed lunatic, no one in my family wants to be on the machine. And then guess what? I get upset that no one is doing what I need or want them to do as quickly as I want them to do it.
