The life you’re living right now – the schedule you keep, the unexpected twists and turns, the dissatisfaction you feel – it isn’t exactly what you pictured, is it?
The child born with special needs.
The child you’re praying for but still haven’t conceived.
The job you lost without explanation.
The husband who left and gave another his name.
The bills you can’t pay and the house you can’t keep.
The family that’s imploding.
The diagnosis that took your breath.
It’s not what you planned for, it’s not what you prepared for, and it’s certainly not what you prayed for.
How do you move forward at all, much less with peace and joy, when the life you thought you’d have looks nothing like the one you live? How do you trust that God is good when everything feels so very bad? How do you set your mind on things above when the things nearby demand your time and attention?
There is a way, but the way is never easy. It’s never natural. It’s never obvious.
The way is through surrender.
Deep down in our cores, we all know we aren’t in control. We know we aren’t the masters of our universe, and we know things will happen that we don’t want and didn’t plan. But while our brains know these things, our hearts have a hard time believing them. So when situations arise that catch us off guard and don’t fit into the visions we have for our lives, our very human response is disbelief.
We feel great disappointment, and we try whatever we can to make sense of what we’re experiencing. Our very human response is to work, watch, and wait for change.
But the change doesn’t always come. At least not in the situation. Sometimes the only change that happens is in us. When situations don’t change, people do, and I’m convinced this may be the point, after all.
I believe in God, and I believe my God is good. But sometimes I struggle to believe He is being good to me.
I often live in a black and white world, and I categorize things as either good or bad.