Ahem. Clear throat.
Today I’m sharing a post called “5 Reasons Why Christian Women Need to Have More Sex” as part of the 31 Days to a Better Marriage series and I’ll just be honest: I’m scared spitless.
I’m beyond terrified to “go there.” This is one of those areas which I do not claim to be an expert in.
Yet I find the topic so biblically underdeveloped that I sense a need to at least blow a trumpet and remind us all where our sights need to be when it comes to physical intimacy.
I’ve been married [for] a long time. Like over 20 years. And I can say the topic of sexual intimacy is a tender one, a sensitive one, to me. Nothing has brought heartache… and joy… to my life and marriage quite like the marriage bed.
I’ve cried desperate tears and prayed desperate prayers and I’ve learned something about sexual intimacy: God made it good, and it’s a symbol of deep spiritual realities.
These realizations keep opening my eyes to new wonder and fresh potential regarding sexual intimacy.
They keep me yearning for a deeper understanding of God through the marriage bed.
They do something else too: they prompt me to pray God’s words back to Him in regards to my sexual relationship with my husband. I keep asking for more ground in this promised land called the Marriage Bed.
Because here’s the deal: I believe the greatest reason Christian women have ho-hum sex lives is [that] we have a watered-down vision regarding sexual intimacy.
When sex is just about feeling good…
or pared down to a set of rules like “don’t do it before marriage and do it after”…
when sex is an obligation or marriage duty, when it is associated with guilt… or shame… or just plain exhaustion.. we lose sight of the glory God intended to display through the marriage bed.
We become vision-less to the depth and grace of sexual intimacy. We begin to wonder what the big deal is anyway?
This is what happens when we’ve lost the eyes to see the grandeur, the mystery, the deeper implications and sacred holiness of our sexuality.
I believe the greatest thing we as Christian women can do to regain our sight, our spark and our sizzle in the bedroom is not to try a new technique or purchase new lingerie.
It isn’t to read a steamy book or watch a soft porn movie.
I believe the greatest thing we can do is pray for vision.
When Jesus asked the vision-less man, “What do you want?” his response was the expected.