7) I don’t make homemade Halloween costumes.
8) I don’t keep house plants.
9) I don’t pick out gifts. (I buy gift cards.)
10) I don’t keep up with new music and tv.
11) I don’t throw Pinterest-worthy parties for my kids.
I’m choosing these things. They aren’t just not happening accidentally. I’m making a conscious choice to not do them during this season. This doesn’t mean I disapprove decorating for Valentine’s Day or running every morning. I like all these things and I especially LOVE when people I know do them. They are just things I’m choosing to release the guilt of ‘not doing it all.’
If we are naming what we don’t do, I think it’s vital to acknowledge what we do. That’s the reason for choosing to fail after all. I make time to write (mostly) every day. I spend time cleaning our home, so my family can have a place to unwind well. I spend time running the kid’s ministry at my church to serve the children and parents well. I take lunch hours to visit my daughter on special days at school.
This is a message about community. It’s a message about the power of knowing what you are designed to do. What are you not doing, so you can do what matters for yourself and those around you?
You don’t need to tell others what you are not doing. But I encourage you to name them for yourself. If you are anything like me, the expectation in your head of how to fulfill the role of woman, wife, or mom is a pretty loud voice. We need to make decisions for ourselves of what we do and don’t do, before enviable guilt will make the decisions for us.
Whether you ‘choose to fail’ or ‘drop the ball,’ my hope is that each of us begin to notice what matters to us and our families, and release unrealistic expectations we put on ourselves to ‘do it all.’