3. It Erodes Trust
And what happens when your husband finds out you’ve lied? It makes it that much more difficult for him to trust you in the future.
Honestly, trust is something that does not come easily to me, personally. But thankfully, honesty is a quality that’s very important to my husband, and he’ll straight up tell me things he does that I don’t like rather than trying to hide them from me.
It may make me angry at the minute when he does things I don’t like. But it makes it SO much easier to trust him because I know he’ll always keep me in the loop about what’s going on.
4. It Prevents Your Husband from Loving You
One of the best feelings in life is to really know and be known by your husband, to know that he knows you inside and out, all of your flaws, and he still adores you anyways. That he sees you and loves you for who you are.
And yet, when you lie to your husband, you prevent this from happening.
When you lie to your husband, he doesn’t get to know you, he gets to know a version of you that’s not true.
And I don’t know about you, but I don’t want my husband to fall in love with some version of someone that’s kind of like me, I want him to fall in love with me!
(Worried that if he really knew you, he wouldn’t love you? Don’t be! He’s your husband. He married you. He loves you. Be brave and open up! Just take it one step at a time. My Closer Marriage Conversation Cards for Couples would be a good place to start.)
5. It Gives the Devil a Foothold
Ephesians 4:27 says “and do not give the devil a foothold.”
For those of you who don’t know, a foothold is a strong, sturdy place to hold your foot, especially while climbing. Without a foothold, you wouldn’t be able to climb. You’d slide right off the rock. But with a foothold, you have a secure place from which to act and move.
And when you give the devil a foothold, you do exactly this.
As Christians, the devil should have NO power over us. “It is finished.” Jesus won. We are victorious. We are more than conquerors (Romans 8:31-39).
But when we give the devil a foothold – typically through sin – we give him a place from which to influence us, work in our lives and torment us.
This is scary stuff you guys!! You DON’T want this to happen! And avoiding sin is one way to help prevent it from happening.
**By the way, if you think you may be struggling with spiritual warfare or the consequences of giving the devil a foothold, I HIGHLY recommend reading one or both of these two books – both by Neil T. Anderson. I’ve read both and they are EXCELLENT.
The Bondage Breaker: Overcoming Negative Thoughts, Irrational Feelings, Habitual Sins
The Steps to Freedom in Christ
There are certain things I will not go NEAR now after reading these books. Scary stuff.
Do I Have to Tell My Spouse EVERYTHING?
I did want to mention one more thing real fast:
Just because you shouldn’t lie to your spouse does NOT mean that you have to tell them every little thing.
It’s okay to keep your mouth shut about how annoying your mother in law is, how terrible his breath is first thing in the morning or how much his snoring drives you crazy. There’s no reason to share every little thought that comes in your mind, especially if it’s not kind.
You just have to consider why you aren’t sharing. Is it something that doesn’t need to be said or is it something you are specifically hiding? If you’re specifically hiding something, then it’s probably something you shouldn’t be doing in the first place and something you need to share. But some things simply don’t need to be said.
Like your mama taught you, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”
(Change the subject, or if you have to, try to put it in a super nice way then distract him with bacon. Everyone loves bacon. 🙂 )
Are there any areas of your life that you need to practice being more truthful in?
