Compromise and changes of heart can resolve many marital disagreements, but what about the ones that seem impossible to fix? I’ve experienced some of these heart-wrenching moments in my marriage. Through faith and trust in God, my husband and I have come out stronger than ever. I hope sharing our experience helps save your marriage from unnecessary stress.
My husband and I have been married for 25 years. We have had our share of disagreements. Most of them we’ve resolved. For example, I wanted a house with lots of windows, he wanted fewer to save money—so we bought a house that was already built. But some conflicts required a deeper approach.
1. Stop Trying to Change Him
It’s hard not to try to change your spouse. I still try to stop my husband from storing the dirty salmon-caked broiler pan in the oven! But when all your pleading, threats, and bargaining haven’t worked, it’s time to stop trying to change him.
Author Michael Wells says that when we try to change people, we take on God’s role without His power. No wonder we feel frustrated! The Bible warns against nagging and instead encourages us to win over our husbands through love.
Sometimes, when we persist in trying to change our husbands, we send the message that we think we are superior. This can make them dig in their heels—not necessarily because they disagree with us, but because they don’t want to be controlled or feel inadequate. Instead, showing love and respect can be the key to a real change of heart.
If that seems impossible, I get it. Read on.
