Today I Took a Picture of Myself in a Bikini

Today I took a picture of myself in a bikini and may I add that I didn’t filter it.

Let the shock set in.

But, I also didn’t share the picture — until now, that is.

Today I took a picture of myself in a bikini because I needed to prove to myself that I was worthy of wearing a bikini.


Seems like a strange word to use when referencing your attire; but yes, for a very long time and since birthing three amazing children, I haven’t quite felt like I am a model candidate for bikini-wearing.

For a few summers now, my [7]-year-old has enjoyed wearing age-appropriate two-pieces, the cutest of which have been the toddler bikinis with her little ‘I-drank-too-much-milk-and-ate-too-many-snacks’ baby gut on display.

Ain’t nothing cuter than that. I mean seriously, any of my little munchkins in their bathing suits give the Coppertone kid a run for their money.

I would say, though, beginning last summer, my daughter would question me as to why I wasn’t wearing a two-piece bathing suit.

I would tell her “Mommy just doesn’t feel comfortable in it,” and when she would push for me to explain what I meant I would just deflect the conversation and bring up a new topic.

I know that I am supposed to model a positive body image for my daughter.

I know that I am supposed to exemplify body self-confidence.

I know that I shouldn’t engage in negative self-talk in front of any of my children, and I sure as heck am aware that I should never make it sound as though my or any person’s appearance is what matters about them. Still, I wore the one-piece, and I’ve worn it pretty often in recent years.

Nicole Merritt
Nicole Merritt
Nicole Merritt is a mother of three, a freelance writer, co-host of I Am The Worst Parent Ever Podcast and the Owner and Founder of jthreeNMe; an imperfectly authentic peek at real-life marriage, parenting, and self-improvement. jthreeNMe is raw, honest, empowering, inspiring, and entertaining; it’s like chicken soup for those that are exhausted, over-stressed and under-inebriated, yet still utterly happy. Nicole's work has been featured by NBC's TODAY Show, Love What Matters, Scary Mommy, The Good Men Project, Elephant Journal, CafeMom, Popsugar, Motherly & many others. You can follow Nicole at and as @jthreeNMe on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram & Twitter!

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