I listen intently as she shares the deep hardship she’s been enduring—the struggle that’s gone on for years. She references her counselor at several points and the wisdom she’s been learning to apply to her life. She’s been able to take a month off of work to focus on her struggle, and since she doesn’t have kids, her life has gone silent in a really good way. I’m happy for her and prayerful this time will be just what she needs to get to a better place.
But deep down, I’m hung low by the reality that my life doesn’t lend to this type of rest. I can’t take a month off or go silent.
Have you ever felt the pain of struggling deeply, yet you don’t have the luxury of time or resources to deal with it? There’s a lot of talk about getting help, taking time off, and going quiet to begin dealing with the hard things in life. But for a mom and any other person who lives a full and demanding life without extra resources, this feels impossible—adding to the burden we’re already feeling.
If this is your reality, might I suggest some ways to begin healing even when your life can’t slow down and the resources you need aren’t available?
How to Begin Healing When You Don’t Have Time
1. Talk about it
Keeping your struggle to yourself only makes it worse. Choose a trusted friend or two you can share your burdens with—no matter how deep and no matter how painful. We weren’t meant to stay silent and alone. If you don’t voice your hurt, the people in your life won’t understand and they will assume you’re functioning at a normal pace and will expect more of you than you have to give.
2. Get outside help
The barrier most people face when wanting to get professional counseling is the cost. But don’t forget to consider the counseling pastor at your church. We’ve benefitted greatly from meeting with ours. A listening ear and an outside perspective does wonders. Don’t be afraid of talking to someone you may see each week at church. Don’t let that be a barrier. That’s what they do. It’s what God has gifted them to do. Take the step.
3. Make time for quiet
But I don’t have time. I get it. I’m in the same boat. But every one of us are involved in activities that are filling precious time we could be using elsewhere. Are there late-night Netflix binge sessions? Mindless Facebook feed scrolling? Books you’re devouring to numb the pain? These activities only fill our minds with more of what we don’t need. Sometimes we have to empty out to fill back up.
Get to bed earlier.
Do what it takes to get some good sleep.
Wake up when the house is sleeping. (If you have infants and young children waking you up in the wee hours, just get the most sleep possible. This may take self-discipline to make sure your own rest is a priority.)
Pray. Burdens don’t belong on your shoulders. God is willing and ready to take them off your mind.