“We were able to talk, really talk, (well, she talked and I held my breath hoping that it wouldn’t stop). She shared all her social circle drama, the comments on social media she had to keep up with, the sleep overs and parties she saw that she knew she wasn’t invited to, and most importantly how she was single handedly owning responsibility for her friend’s life. My teen was relieved when we talked through how to break the silence and get her friend help, real help, and that it wasn’t my daughter’s responsibility to carry that burden, especially not alone. Together we came up with a plan to involve adults who can support her friend and break the silence over suicidal thoughts.”
Allison says that navigating technology with and for our teens is no easy task. But she’s happy to report that their bedtime routine has radically changed her daughter for the better.
“After the dust settled and we stuck to our new “no phone at bedtime” rule, I was amazed at the changes we saw. I could tell that my girl was so relieved! Much like setting limits with a curfew, she needed that structure from us to take the pressure off. Also, while initially it was an adjustment for all of us at bedtime to take the phone (not going to lie, some days were harder than others depending on what was going on socially), after awhile it became routine. She began to use our limits to protect herself too, telling peers her mom and dad were taking the phone (we gave her permission to blame us for any lame-ness). She got sleep, she was less irritable and I saw my beautiful girl come back.”
Parents, it’s so important for us to set the tone for healthy boundaries when it comes to technology use. Our kids’ health is SO worth it, and so is the battle of putting the device to bed.
Stay vigilant, friends.