In an effort to not be a complainer throughout my life, I overcompensated and tried to never, EVER express any irritation or frustration about anything. I sought to only speak gratitude and accept everything that came my way because I thought it was wrong or lacking in faith to ever express disappointment or frustration. It never occurred to me this had to do with being emotionally honest.
I was hiding. Hiding from my feelings, myself, and my God.
That is, until I couldn’t handle it anymore and my anger, frustration and disappointment BOILED over and I spiraled into either blowing a gasket OR descended into sorrow and depression, and then guilt and shame over not being completely okay with the circumstances of my life.
NOT healthy or good!
Over time I have learned that ignoring or glossing-over my true feelings only gives those feelings the power to multiply and grow. In the dark, they gain power and strength. I do believe in the importance of gratitude. I do believe that to only complain is still wrong. I do believe that we set the tenor of our lives by where our minds focus and what our lips speak. I do believe in the power of seeing the good and in trusting God, regardless of the circumstances of my life.
I have also come to believe in the absolute necessity of acknowledging how I am feeling-the good AND the bad, the joyful AND the disappointing, the delightful AND the frustrating. There is no sin or shame in being honest about my feelings. Jesus was honest about His emotions. He wept. He was a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief. He got angry. He expressed disappointment and frustration. He laughed. He delighted. He appreciated. He loved. He was God AND human and He dealt with EVERYTHING we do, including emotions. (Hebrews 4:15)