“2020 will not break me.” It was a text I sent to my friend the other day in response to her checking in.
In all honesty I was hoping for some vent text session between us, so I could validate the pity party I was throwing for myself, but instead she sent three short sentences. “We will get through this. We have no other choice. We have to.”
She was right. In all her bluntness and her truth bomb – we have to.
We have to adapt.
We have to manage.
Cope. Prepare. Plan.
We have to be ready to mother through unprecedented times.
And as much as it sucks; as much as I want to eat my feelings in a pint of Ben & Jerry’s – there’s still crap that needs to be done. There’s still decisions that need to be made.
If there were ever a time to let perfection go, it’s this year. It’s right now, sis. At this moment. Today. Whatever you’re doing, whatever clock you’re racing against, whatever to-do list you’re trying to check off – put it down.
Now is not the time to crush it. It’s not the time to figure out life’s secret to happiness, it’s about survival. It’s about ensuring our families are safe and well cared for. It’s making sure that we’re together even when right now we feel isolated and unsure. It’s making choices I never thought I would have to make for my family. It’s setting aside opinions and making those choices based on your gut and what is right for YOU.
This year has changed me in ways I never saw coming. Some good, some bad.
Every lack of patience and area where I need improvement, exposed for all to see.
But, it also showed me my strength and my perseverance.
Ask to see someone with strength; someone who perseveres; someone with enough grit and determination in their bones for ten people; someone who never quits, who gives tirelessly of themselves without hesitation day after day and I’ll show you a mother.
They say this year will be the death of the working mom; that women everywhere will be set back years in the strides we’ve made for a seat at the table, but apparently those researchers have never met a mother before – at least not the women I’ve encountered.
Is 2020 hard? Absolutely. It’s a wash in so many ways. It sits like a rock in the pit of my stomach and keeps me awake at night. It’s worry and disappointment. Uncertainty and chaos, but it will not break me and it will not break you either, sis.
Why? Because we’re women. Because we’re mothers. Because no matter what life throws at us we power through. We push forward. There is no other option. We know no other way.
This year is the year of the woman. It’s the year of the mother. The worker. The teacher. The caregiver. The life-breather. It’s the year where women everywhere are rising up and making choices we’ve never dreamt we’d have to make for our children and our families; for our careers and our livelihoods.
Am I stumbling? Sure. Are there days where I wonder how I can keep this up; how I can remain sane and juggle it all? You bet. But I’m doing it. We’re doing it.
And we’ll continue to do it, because as a mother it’s what we do. It’s who we are. We rise up. We pick ourselves up off the floor and we go – again and again and again.
2020 will not break you, sis.
And to anyone who says otherwise – clearly they’ve never met a mother.
This post originally appeared at They Whine so I Whine, published with permission.