Some would think that I have a lot of experience as a mother.
I’ve birthed 4 babies.
I’ve had triplets.
I’ve had a chronically ill child.
I’ve lost a child.
I’ve adopted.
I’ve been a foster mom.
I’ve pretty much done it all . . . experiencing every joy, every heartache, every failure and every success of motherhood.
I’ve had good days and bad days.
I’ve fumbled through some days . . . with kids fighting, a messy house, burning dinner and feeling like I’ve done everything wrong.
And I’ve had Super Mom days where the house is clean, the kids behave and I’ve felt like I’ve done everything right.
I’ve laughed so hard in the fun times, making great memories. And I’ve cried so often . . . in the car, in the shower, in the closet – worried and scared and heartbroken.
I have yelled and nagged on my worst days. And encouraged, praised and listened on my best days.
I have failed so many times. And stayed up late worrying about my kids. Wondering if I am doing anything right as a mom?
And after being a mother for 21 years, here’s what I know . . .
Absolutely nothing.
I am still learning every day how to mother these children of mine that are so very different. What works for one child does not always work for another.
I’m still making mistakes. I still fail daily.
I still have no idea what I am doing. I’m still winging it, stumbling through each day on love and a prayer.